Question: I am a 28-year-male. I am still a virgin and my better half lives in USA. Since most recent 2 years I've turned out to be extremely fixated sexually, to such an extent that at whatever point I see appealing ladies I get stimulated. I have even begun fantasizing about my cousin sisters and other ladies of my family, yet as a general rule I really feel extremely remorseful of this and never need to do such things in light of my relatives. At whatever point I am excited, the primary individual ringing a bell is either my cousin sister or my close relative. If it's not too much trouble bail me out of this humiliating circumstance.
Reply by Dr Atul Aswani: Here are a few pointers to handle your circumstance.
1. There was a period two years back, when you permitted yourself to think on sexual subjects and by today you have done as such much feeling that sexual musings come programmed to you.
The point here is that you can unlearn these musings generally as you have learned them.
2. The most ideal approach to beat speculation is accomplishing something else. Take up a practice schedule. Build up an engrossing interest. You will discover your considerations are lesser.
3. The very truth that relatives showing up in your dreams makes you uncomfortable implies that you don't need anything like that to happen in your life. Your blame is verification that you don't welcome that.
4. At last, let us separate amongst "fascination" and "activity on the fascination". Now and again you can't resist getting pulled in, yet whether to make a move on the fascination or not is totally your call.
This is in the brain. It has nothing to do with whether you are a virgin or not. What's more, yes, taking control of your psyche is totally your occupation. Not your girlfriend's. Whether she is in US or alongside you.
– By Dr Atul Aswani is a Psychiatrist and Counselor situated in Mumbai.
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